Doing Things For My Mom, That She Once Did For Me

June 25, 2018

I heard the words, "how do I do this", blurted out of my mom's mouth. 

I was busy putting away my mom's shower supplies, after she had showered, when I heard these words. I glanced over at my mom as she was holding up her hair elastic to her head.

I quickly stopped what I was doing, and told her she didn't need to worry about it, because I would help her.

Typically the inside of me would have stopped, felt shocked, & sad at the same time. These kind of questions my mom asks, shows me the progression of the Frontotemporal Dementia, she has. I have become accustomed to hearing stuff like this lately. On this day, it didn't phase me. Maybe, because I have been helping my mom with her hair for years, and I already know she needs help to put her hair up how she likes it.

Instead, I told my mom something similar to this.

I started combing my mom's hair and told my mom that she use to do my hair, like I was doing hers. She replied with a question "I did?". 

I told my mom that, " I am now doing your hair, like you once did for me."

I always try to reassure her, that I will always be there to help her, so she feels comforted.

I have learned with Dementia, that I am blessed to be able to do the things for my mom, that she once did for me. I am now returning the favor.

This just shows that something, as easy as putting hair up in a ponytail, is HARD and IMPOSSIBLE for someone in the later stages of Dementia.

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